Apocalypse Mode · Alien Invasion

What do I need for an alien invasion?

No landings are expected. The information problem, however, is completely real.

Fictional scenario · real preparedness list

A playful alien arrival watched from a cozy prepared home with snacks, maps and camping supplies

The defining feature of every invasion film is that nobody can find out what is actually happening. Strip away the spacecraft and you have a very ordinary scenario: networks overloaded, rumours everywhere, and one household calmly listening to the radio.

This list leans on information, documents and the ability to move — the three things that are useful in any confusing week, extraterrestrial or otherwise.

Information

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The first casualty, every time.

Battery or wind-up radio

When the mobile network is congested or down, local radio is still telling you which roads are closed and where to go. It is the one information source that does not depend on your phone.

Why you need it. When the mobile network is congested or down, local radio is still telling you which roads are closed and where to go. It is the one information source that does not depend on your phone.

What to look for. A wind-up or battery radio with FM and, ideally, weather or emergency bands. A model that also charges a phone earns its shelf space.

Hand-crank charger

A power bank runs out. A crank or solar charger keeps a phone alive for messages and maps for as long as you are willing to turn the handle.

Why you need it. A power bank runs out. A crank or solar charger keeps a phone alive for messages and maps for as long as you are willing to turn the handle.

What to look for. A crank or folding solar charger with a standard USB output, and a cable that fits your phone. Check the output is enough to charge, not merely to slow the drain.

Power bank

Keeps a phone, GPS watch or headlamp alive on long days, and cold weather drains batteries much faster than you expect.

Why you need it. Keeps a phone, GPS watch or headlamp alive on long days, and cold weather drains batteries much faster than you expect.

What to look for. A 10,000 mAh unit is a sensible balance of capacity and weight for most trips. Bring the right cable — the bank alone is useless.

Paper map

Navigation apps assume signal, battery and working servers. A folded local map assumes nothing and never reboots.

Why you need it. Navigation apps assume signal, battery and working servers. A folded local map assumes nothing and never reboots.

What to look for. A current road or topographic map covering your area and your likely route out, with your meeting points marked in pen.

Basics, regrettably

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Nobody in a film ever packs these, and it shows.

Stored drinking water

Water is the first thing to run short and the hardest to improvise. Three litres per person per day covers drinking and basic cooking, and having it already in the house means you never join the queue for it.

Why you need it. Water is the first thing to run short and the hardest to improvise. Three litres per person per day covers drinking and basic cooking, and having it already in the house means you never join the queue for it.

What to look for. Sealed bottles or food-grade containers holding three days' worth per person, kept somewhere cool and dark. Write the date on them and swap the stock out twice a year.

Shelf-stable food

Three days of food that needs no fridge and little or no cooking removes the pressure to shop during exactly the week everyone else is shopping.

Why you need it. Three days of food that needs no fridge and little or no cooking removes the pressure to shop during exactly the week everyone else is shopping.

What to look for. Tins, dried pasta, rice, nut butter and long-life milk you actually like eating, so the stock quietly rotates through normal meals instead of expiring in a cupboard.

Manual can opener

A cupboard of tins and no way into them is the most avoidable failure on this list, and electric openers are useless the moment the power goes.

Why you need it. A cupboard of tins and no way into them is the most avoidable failure on this list, and electric openers are useless the moment the power goes.

What to look for. A simple metal opener with a comfortable handle. Keep it in the same place as the emergency food, not in the general kitchen drawer where it wanders off.

First aid kit

Blisters, grazes and headaches are the everyday injuries, and all of them are far more manageable with a small kit in the bag.

Why you need it. Blisters, grazes and headaches are the everyday injuries, and all of them are far more manageable with a small kit in the bag.

What to look for. Blister plasters, adhesive dressings, antiseptic wipes, painkillers and a bandage. Restock it after every trip rather than before the next one.

Medication buffer

For anyone on regular medication this is the most important item here, and it is the one that takes planning rather than shopping.

Why you need it. For anyone on regular medication this is the most important item here, and it is the one that takes planning rather than shopping.

What to look for. A few extra days of any prescription, arranged with your pharmacy in advance, plus a written list of doses in your document pack.

If you move

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Leaving is a decision, not a panic.

Go bag

Almost every evacuation warning gives you minutes, not hours. A packed bag turns a panic into simply picking something up on the way out.

Why you need it. Almost every evacuation warning gives you minutes, not hours. A packed bag turns a panic into simply picking something up on the way out.

What to look for. A rucksack per person holding water, snacks, a torch, a charger, medication, spare clothes and copies of documents. Repack it when the seasons change.

Document pack

Insurance, identity and medical paperwork are what make the recovery possible, and they are exactly what nobody remembers while leaving in a hurry.

Why you need it. Insurance, identity and medical paperwork are what make the recovery possible, and they are exactly what nobody remembers while leaving in a hurry.

What to look for. Copies of ID, insurance, prescriptions and property documents in a waterproof wallet, plus the same set encrypted somewhere online.

Small cash reserve

Card terminals and cash machines are the first things to stop working in a power cut, and small notes still buy fuel, food and a taxi.

Why you need it. Card terminals and cash machines are the first things to stop working in a power cut, and small notes still buy fuel, food and a taxi.

What to look for. Enough small notes and coins for a couple of days of essentials, stored with your documents rather than in a wallet you carry.

Written household plan

The part people skip and later wish they had not: who collects whom, where you meet if you cannot get home, and which out-of-area contact everyone calls.

Why you need it. The part people skip and later wish they had not: who collects whom, where you meet if you cannot get home, and which out-of-area contact everyone calls.

What to look for. One page, printed, in every bag and on the fridge. Agree it out loud with everyone, including the children, and revisit it once a year.

Signal mirror

A mirror flash is visible for miles in daylight, works with no battery, and weighs less than the phone you were hoping to be rescued by.

Why you need it. A mirror flash is visible for miles in daylight, works with no battery, and weighs less than the phone you were hoping to be rescued by.

What to look for. A small unbreakable signalling mirror with a sighting hole, kept in your go bag alongside the whistle.